Category Archives: Funny

Six Flags Over Nonsense

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Several months ago, I took a survey on the Six Flags website. When it asked me which Six Flags I visited most, I wasn’t sure what to say because I don’t go often. Then I saw an option that said “I really never visit any of these” and chose it. I love the personal email I immediately got in my inbox from Six Flags!

Here is what it said:

We are working on a new park newsletter for I really never visit any of these! which we hope will improve the park experience for everyone by ask our expect guests to share some recommendations about how to enjoy the park best. How it works is simple: we’ll ask you (our expert) a bunch of questions about what you like, and most importantly why you recommend it. We’ll then combine your answers with other guests to come up with recommendations we’ll send out to everyone.

If we use your recommendation, we’ll print your name (next to your recommendation) in the newsletter. We’ll also pick one winner each issue from among those whose recommendations appeared in print to receive a free pair of tickets to the park.

Are you willing to share your I really never visit any of these! recommendations with other guests?

Can we say form letter? But I’m so glad they sent it to me! It cracked me up! 😀

A Preview

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Today Phillip came and asked me where the checkbook is. I was thinking Maybe Luke asked him to look at it for part of school? But he’s not here! Maybe he got back and sent Phillip for it for some reason? But I just said, “Why?” He said, “Because I need to look at it.” Now I was really curious! Why does he need to look at the checkbook? Isn’t he a little young for this? I just looked at him a bit confused, and he said, “I need it for school.”

Then it dawned on me. He was referring to the score key for his school work!! Mystery solved!

But maybe I just got a little preview of what may be coming in a few years?

A Kind Inspiration

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Today at Stop & Shop, the lady behind me in the checkout line was very kind to me. I forgot something pretty close to where I was checking out, and she actually offered to go get it for me and was still smiling when she returned! How often does that happen?

While putting my groceries (and kids) in the car, I heard the lady parked next to me on the phone asking someone about jumper cables. (Yes, it took me this long to notice her hood was up!)

Well, I had just been treated very kindly, so I was inspired to pass the kindness on. So, I started helping her look around for someone with jumper cables, thinking who better to jump her off than someone in a 15 passenger van, especially since I happened to be parked right beside her?

Once I was done helping her, I made my grand exit. I walked around the front of my van, and suddenly I was flat on my back! Yes, it happened that fast. I have no idea what happened, but one minute I was up, and the next I was down. I fell over a shrub and ended up laughing on the ground while the lady I helped stood helplessly over me saying, “Are you alright?”

By the way, did I ever tell you that my name means “gazelle,” which happens to be a very graceful animal! Ha!

A No Touch Detour

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Anna and I went to the airport tonight to pick up my mom, who is moving here. We rode a bus about 45 minutes to the airport. After using the restroom, I called Luke to let him know we had made it and could find our way around the airport quite well. That is when he told us that we needed to get right back on a bus to head back home!

My mom’s flight had been delayed to the point that there would be no bus to get us home that late at night. So, we took a 1.5 hour trip to the airport just to use their bathroom and leave!! 😀

The interesting thing is that on the way to the airport, the bus driver was ahead of schedule, so he went out of his way to drop me at the airport about 20 minutes before he was actually supposed to. After I talked to Luke, Anna and I actually had time to get back to the bus stop in time to catch the same bus when we were supposed to be getting off! How’s that for cool?

Wanna know what else is cool? For the first time ever, I had the privelege of entering a restroom that was completely no touch. The toilets, water, soap, and dryers were all no touch. Maybe eventually there will be a no touch toilet paper dispenser! Then again, the no touch technology is scary enough as it is!

Picker Slapper

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While listening to Peter read today, I was shocked when he suddenly slapped his own hand.

Me: Peter, why did you slap yourself?
Peter: I picked my nose. Daddy told me to slap my hand every time I pick my nose.
Me: (speechless and trying to hold back laughter)
Peter: I pick my nose a lot, so I slap myself a lot.

When he cracked a smile, I could no longer hide it, and we all burst into laughter. Where does that little boy come up with this stuff? And this from Mister I’m Not a Clown!

Batman or Spiderman?

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Normally when  child wears an outfit as soon as he possibly can, it is because it is his favorite outfit. Apparently that is not so with Peter. Tonight he was wearing a pair of Batman pajamas that he wears a lot. Here is how the conversation went:

me: Hey Batman

Peter: I’m not Batman. I like being Spiderman!

me: I thought you liked Batman.

Peter: No, it’s Phillip that likes Batman.

me: Oh. Then why do you wear your Batman pajamas so much?

Peter: Because I want to hurry up and get them dirty, so I won’t have to wear them any more!

What a creative way not to have to wear a certain pair of pajamas. I would have never thought of it. As a kid, I would have been more likely to leave them in my drawer until I absolutely had to wear them, hoping that laundry would get done often enough that I didn’t have to wear them at all! I guess we don’t all think alike! What would you have done?

Let’s Get Rid of Them!

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Today Anna, Peter, and I had dentist appointments. This meant that Phillip, who loves games, was going to be left at home with no one old enough to play games with. Luke was trying to make him feel better, and this is the conversation that occurred between my two jokesters.

Luke: We’re gonna get rid of them. Doesn’t that sound fun?

Phillip: No, that doesn’t sound fun……..because they will come back.

The Mom Song

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A friend shared a song with me on Sunday that was very good, but I will probably never be able to sing it. Yet I seem to sing it daily…at least parts of it. I will sing other parts of it when my children are a bit older. 🙂

I discovered that The Mom Song was actually written by Anita Renfroe, whom I will be posting more about later. For now, let’s watch it sung by someone else. I am posting this particular version because it has the words to help you attempt to keep up with the speed of the song. 🙂

The Mom Song from Northland Video on Vimeo.

Eater of Onions

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Over Thanksgiving holidays, I had this conversation with Phillip, who did not know that green bean casserole contained onions (of course, I’m not sure if french fried onions count).

Me: Phillip, you left a few onions on your plate.

Phillip: From what?

Me: From the green bean casserole.

Phillip: What?! I ate onions?! I guess I like onions then!